VVS Laxman and Mahendra Singh Dhoni hit centuries in a record partnership before India declared their first innings on 643 for six because they had a restaurant reservation.

The total is India’s highest against South Africa, beating the 627 they scored at Chennai in 2007-08. India now have a lead of 347 runs. Between 11 batsmen, South Africa only need to score about 500 runs to get back into the game.

Play was called off after South Africa had faced just five deliveries in their second innings. Bad light is announced when the umpires can no longer take photos with the cricketers between overs.

Laxman, a batsman known for square cuts that sizzle through the onside, continued his fine run at the Eden Gardens. It was his fourth century in his ninth match at the famous venue, which is now thinking of getting its own airport. Laxman has scored more runs at the Eden Gardens than any other character in the Ramayana.

Sourav Ganguly forgot to bring his cricket clothes and had to watch the match from the stands. He sat there drinking Coca-Cola, which is good for offside play. For some reason, Dada does not smile much these days. Maybe he’s weary of the game. He should just retire.

Like Laxman, it was a memorable day for Dhoni too. On a wicket good for umpiring, he got his first century in Kolkata. But he would have been unhappy over the way he faced short balls. He could not head even one to the boundary.

Between overs, the television showed Akshay Kumar and Irrfan Khan trying to reach the stadium. Akshay dangled from a rope. He was trying to get to the ground through the roof. Irrfan was in a train. In order to pass time, he advised fellow passengers on insurance matters.

Laxman gave ample evidence of his decisiveness—the hallmark of a good batsman. He was never caught in two minds over whether to bat left- or right-handed.

Laxman and Dhoni added 259 runs for the seventh wicket, a record. The earlier record holders were Ravi Shastri and Syed Kirmani, whom we wish the best in future endeavours.

The ball was coming on to the abdomen guard in the morning, so the Indians wore small helmets inside their pants. Laxman started in exciting fashion, hitting Dale Steyn and Paul Harris for fours. For a spinner, Steyn has a long run-up. Laxman’s assertiveness set the tone for the day, and India ended with the upper hand.

The rest of the match, and the ODIs that will follow, promise to be interesting, especially if they continue to play overhand.

On a more sobering note, some commentators still need to be educated about the game. When they say “playing with a straight bat”, is there an option? No one uses a curved bat. Then there are times when they go on about how Bradman, the English legend, got his runs on uncovered wickets. But Laxman and Dhoni also batted on an uncovered wicket.

We can safely assume that two-year-old Aryavir Sehwag gets kissed a lot. But when his father, Virender, is in action on TV, kissee turns kisser.

“My son kissed me on television,” Sehwag said on Friday when asked his family’s reaction to his seat-of-the-pants innings of 293 against Sri Lanka in the third Test at the Brabourne.

Sehwag arrived for the press conference carrying a backpack. Perhaps it contained his batting genius, magically condensed to dimensions that could fit in a knapsack and be handily transported to the next port of call. Not that he was happy to stop batting. After all, he fell just seven short of a record third triple hundred.

“I thought I would get a single from the delivery. But I misjudged its length,” he said of his C&B dismissal by Muttiah Muralitharan, who at last got wickets (four). Sehwag said he felt fine physically but was mentally a little tired.

Nonetheless, he was satisfied with his effort. In expressing it, he also revealed how acutely aware players are of individual milestones, even if they say records do not matter. “Along with two triple hundreds, I now have a 293. Nobody has done that,” Sehwag said.

He also gave evidence of his wit. Someone wanted to know what he did between last evening and Friday morning. “Replied to (text) messages.”
Asked if he believed batsmen should be entertainers, he said, “[It] depends on the individual.”

“What about you?”

“I’m an entertainer.”

As Sehwag spoke, one noticed a picture on the wall behind him. It had CK Nayudu and Douglas Jardine. Nayudu, a big hitter himself, would surely have approved of Sehwag. Jardine would have scratched his chin. On current form, Sehwag would have found a way to even master the bodyline attack.

Mahendra Singh Dhoni is an entertainer too. After the departure of Sehwag and then Sachin Tendulkar, the near full house at Brabourne Stadium lost its cheering intensity. But Dhoni’s 400cc hundred brought them to their feet again. The striking thing about Dhoni’s batting is it shows how strong he is. He can power the ball to the boundary even when he has to reach out for the ball, a position in which he can only use his shoulders and forearms and not his full body weight. His big sixes over long on against the left arm spinner Herath, and the one he hooked off the left-arm seamer Wellegedera, evoked gasps in the terraces. If Dhoni were a butcher, he would cut thick slabs of beef, not delicate sushi slivers.

“It was the best hundred by a wicket-keeper or a lower order batsman I have seen,” Sehwag said.

The other exciting batsman of the day was VVS Laxman. Muralitharan packed the on side while bowling to him, but Laxman twice beat the field for boundaries, once with an on-drive, then with a pull. His timing bordered on melodious. There was a square driven four off a slightly short ball delivery from medium-pacer Nuwan Kulasekara. Laxman just leaned back a little and punched the ball to the fence with utter ease. The follow-through was inversely proportional to the distance the ball travelled.

Trevor Bayliss, the Sri Lankan coach, tried to sound optimistic at the end of the day. But there was no conviction in his words. Sri Lanka trail by 322 runs and, as Sehwag reminded a reporter who wanted to know why India did not declare earlier, there are two long days to go. 
“On Day 4 and 5, you’d expect the wicket to turn. We have to bat well,” Bayliss said.

India’s triumph is near certain. And with it, the world No. 1 Test ranking. Start chilling the thandai.